Gen Y: ultramodern, progressive, and what not! We have labelled ourselves as hip and happening, yet a large number of our population can’t choose their careers, let alone their life partners.

Forget about admitting to homosexuality, even heterosexuals aren’t free to choose the people they want to marry and spend the rest of their lives with.

So if you are also fed up with exhibiting your talents of cooking and selling yourself by flashing your yearly income, then this is for you. Go and get rid of arranged marriage!

Introduce your Invisible Friend

Introduce them to your invisible friend who is sitting right next to them. Tell them that you people have been ‘friends’ since childhood and you would wanna bring him/her along with you after marriage.

get rid of Arranged Marriage

The Dead Spouse

Drop hints of you being married before and that your parents are hiding it because your ex-spouses are all dead. And yes, don’t forget to flash that creepy pee-in-the-pants smile!

get rid of Arranged Marriage

A Simple NO

You can always simply say ‘no’ to him/her but do so with elan. Walk in the room, look at them and exclaim, seriously!’ or what-were-you-thinking’?!

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Set your Demands

Demand for jewellery, cars, and other expenses. Tell them that you wanna fulfil all your expensive dreams and wishes that you couldn’t do in your own house.

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Do the Kangana in a Towel

Oh, we can always go the Kangana way. The way she struts in front of her family in just a towel was simply awesome. If not a towel then a ‘barely-there’ dress. Remember Munnabhai meeting Chinki in the pub? The dress was pichu se akkha khulla!

For Guys, you can go for shorty shorts or better yet – Lungi utha ke disco dikhati!

get rid of Arranged Marriage

The Homosexual Angle

It’s always a good idea to include your friend in mischief. Ask your best bud to come storming into your house screaming, “Ye shaadi nahi ho sakti!” Ask him/her to disclose your gay/lesbian love while indicating those secret vacations!

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Bad Habits with a nasty twist

This one’s my favourite. Ask them if they’d wanna share a smoke. Pull out a packet of Gutka/Khaini from your bra/undergarment and ask ‘do you mind?’

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Show off your skills

Arranged marriage meetings generally include putting yourself up for exhibition and showing off your talents. Do so! Like your horrible singing skills that could make the dead turn in their grave, or your juggling skills where you accidentally hit your future in-laws…

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Zero Personal Hygiene

Beauty can be dangerous but we have got your back. Avoid bathing for a day or two before the meeting, sweat it out in the gym, don’t wash your hair, grow a really long beard and wear sleeveless with tufts of hair at your armpits. Don’t forget to PUT YOUR HANDS UP IN THE AIR!

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Be Realistic

Tell them that you don’t wanna have kids as there as so many orphans or that you are reproductively challenged.

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Sex Life to the rescue

Talk about your sex life. Be very vivid and share details or even try and enact them. The more visual, the faster they are gonna run out.

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Public fiasco

In case the meeting is outside, lech at other people, pass vulgar comments and discuss the probability of threesomes. The weirder, the better!

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Gas!

Fart! Simply fart your ass off. Start practising now!

get rid of Arranged Marriage

Now that i have given you enough ideas, use them all, go and live a happy life and stop worrying! Also don’t be selfish by keeping these to yourself. Share this post with other poor souls who are looking for some help!

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